Job Search Hell
I have come to the conclusion that job searching is one of the worst human experiences aka the soul-sucking circle of rejection process, as I like to call it.
How do we stay motivated and optimistic when we're lucky to get an interview?
At this point I'm trying not to dwell on the negativity. It's a part of getting out there and making life happen... or so I'm telling myself. My list of bad interviewers (lazy eyes, weird smells, etc) goes on and so do the resumes I send.
I think my skepticism of "the work world" started in high school. I worked at a chain bookstore and it was awful. The people were rude and when it was slow it was ssllooww... in fact, I remember falling asleep in the kids section and waking up just in time to go home. That's when the camp counselor jobs and coffee shops became my thing. Now I have this expensive piece of paper on my wall and I refuse to let it constrict me to a horrible, meaningless job and that isn't too much to ask for, right?
So my recent run of luck has been less than spectacular. It all started with my summer internship. I was so hopeful, so enthusiastic and so completely clueless that they saw me as free labor and nothing more. Hardly the "wow, you are fabulous we can't let you leave. Please accept our offer and the perks that come along with it" I was hoping for.
Then there was the internship interview that included meeting with five people in the agency and a writing test, only to wait months until "they" decided "they" couldn't afford to take on a part-time intern. (I still don't know who the "they" is/are)
And now, I work for a radio group in the promotions department. I hand out free stuff, play loud music, stand out in the cold for long periods of time, wait for an email schedule that is subject to change each day, wait for phone calls about time changes and every once in a while, score concert tickets. It really isn't so bad.
For once I would like to put out an ad for a company. I would like to say this is what I am looking for, these are my qualifications, this is what I am willing to do for you, this is the environment I want to be a part of and if you think you qualify you can email me a cover letter, resume, references, samples of work and web site, if available.
Ahh well... there are plenty of odd jobs out there. Right now I'm considering substitute teaching. I love city kids, hate cubicle jobs and I have a degree so that should be worth something. Hmm, it's been a recurring idea for the last month and my application is almost complete. Something is making me hesitate, I don't know if it's that I think "what if one of the thirty resumes I have out in the universe works out... could I just quit?"
Actually, that is the exact reason why I'm sitting on it. I hate the idea of abandoning that job because there is such a great need for good people in the school system. I would feel really bad about ditching out on the teachers and students. Well, we'll see what I end up doing with that...
My point with this entry is to say this sucks for everyone. It's not just me that hates going through it, it is universal and I need to remember that each time I start whining about how much life blows and blah, blah, blah. I suppose without this struggle it would be harder to appreciate the "big break" when it does happen. So in reality, those of us in this situation are lucky. We won't take our opportunities for granted and maybe, when the time comes, we'll find ways to helps others get their appendages in the door, up the stairs and in to a position they love.
Here's to the future....
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